When Trust Is In Your Hands

Trust is the priceless commodity requiring a committed investment.

“Trust me.”

We’ve all heard it, and we’ve probably said it, too. And at some point, we’ve crossed our fingers hoping those two little words would be enough to make people believe in us.

But let’s be honest. They’re not.

You have to sell it.

Just because you are in charge does not mean people automatically trust you. Trust does not come with the job title. Trust is earned, every single day in every single interaction. And trust is what really sets good leaders apart from great ones.

Leadership is a sales job. If you want your employees, colleagues and clients to trust you, you have to sell them on it. You must persuade them to buy into the notion that you are trustworthy, professional, competent, an expert — or whatever it is you need them to understand so you can work together productively.

You need to sell yourself so the people you work with feel connected to you, comfortable with you and confident that they can trust you.

Make Trust Your Priority

I worked with a client who is the perfect example of a manager selling her people on trust. We’ll call her Mattie. She stepped into the CEO role of a company when it was really struggling. In our coaching, she shared with me that she inherited a lot of issues, but one of the biggest ones was a deep distrust of leadership. The prior leadership apparently had issued mandates without getting buy-in from the team or understanding their circumstances.

Mattie knew she couldn’t push her agenda on the team, and she also knew they were feeling pretty beaten up, unseen and unheard of from their prior leadership. So, she hit pause before she even got started. She knew she had to rebuild trust in leadership before she did anything else.

She shared with her team that her role was to serve them, and not the other way around. She arranged meetings with employees from each division so she could hear their complaints, frustrations and ideas. From these findings, she created a plan with her corporate team that within 90 days they would work to solve as many of those issues as possible. The whole time, she shared a weekly video with updates and continued to solicit feedback from employees and from the team on how things were progressing.

The result was a trusting relationship — and the key to turning the company from barely surviving to thriving.

Brains vs. Buy-in

A few years ago, I worked with a sales leader who came in full of enthusiasm, great ideas and more energy than seemed humanly possible. She made a lot of changes and set big goals. On paper, she was doing everything right. Still, six months in, something was not clicking.

The team was disengaged, and people were exhausted.

She had the brains. What she didn’t have was the buy-in.

Her team trusted her competence, but they did not feel connected to her. They appreciated her bold approach, but her ideas did not resonate with them because she had not taken the time to build trust with the team. She skipped a huge part of Leadership 101: You have to sell if you want your team to buy.

She expected that her experience and passion would speak for themselves, but no one was listening because they did not trust her yet. In sales, there’s a saying: “People buy from people they trust.” So, the first sale any leader has to make is about trust.

Sell Yourself

People work hard for leaders they trust. They are willing to go the extra mile. They support those leaders. They stay loyal to organizations led by people they trust.

But trust is not automatic. Good sales leaders know that, and so do you. Something you might not know is that buy-in begins with what your team observes about you: your behavior and words. What you do for them will often translate into what they will do for you and for the company.

If you’re wary about this because your job doesn’t have anything to do with sales, don’t worry. You have made many sales during your life. In fact, you have made sales already today.

Whenever you suggest a plan to your team, your bosses or even your family, you’re selling. Whenever you ask for a favor and the answer is “yes,” you’ve made a sale. Every time you assign a task to a direct report, you’re trying to sell that person on doing the work, doing it well and doing it on time.

You sell your ideas, your strategy, your vision. You’re asking people to buy in, to care for and to show up. When the answer is “yes,” it’s because you have convinced people to trust you enough to buy into what you’re asking for. You have sold them.

Trust Equals Credibility

Trust is not about huge gestures or public statements. Trust is built in the micro-moments. It’s the conversations in the hallway, the follow-up emails you send (or don’t), the way you handle tough feedback, and how you show up when things don’t go as planned. These are the moments that persuade others to follow their leader.

Here are a few ways that great leaders build trust:

1. Be real before being right. People don’t need a superhero. They need a superhuman, meaning someone who is great at being a human. So, be that. We think credibility comes from having all the answers. But the truth is that credibility comes from being authentic. Admit it when you mess up. Share what you learned the hard way. And ask for input, even if you know it is going to sting.
   
   
2. Be consistent (all the time). Trust is not just built during team meetings and retreats. It is built every day, all day. People need to know they can depend on you, always. Do your words match your actions? Do you treat the intern with the same respect as the VP? People notice these things, and they remember them.
   
   
3. Listen like it’s your job — because it is. Good leaders talk. Great leaders listen and follow up. Listening isn’t about waiting for your turn to add to the conversation. It is about actively showing people that they matter. When people feel heard and seen, that’s when trust begins.
   
   One great leader I know, the head of product development for a small company, was promoted to his position after several leadership changes, and all he could see was challenges. So, he shared that with his staff: product flaws, financial worries and the difficult decisions that lay ahead. He didn’t sugarcoat the bad news. Instead, he asked the staff for help, delegated responsibility and authorized teams to experiment with solutions. And when the higher-ups objected to anything, he had his employees’ backs.
   
   It turns out, he had a truly creative and competent staff. As they began to trust their new manager, they became more engaged and took ownership of the company’s success. The team, once cynical and reluctant to step up, became loyal and high performing.
   
   They solved problems, and not just for the company. They did it for the manager who had asked them for their help.
   
   
4. Make it safe for others to speak the truth. People won’t be honest if they fear consequences. Create a culture where people feel free to share, and candor is respected and welcomed. One of my clients started doing a “let’s be honest” check-in at each meeting. It was a time for people to share literally anything without repercussions. Trust blossomed. So did productivity.
   
   
5. Share the credit, take the blame. Nothing builds trust faster than a leader who is willing to share the spotlight. Celebrate your team’s wins publicly. Thank individuals by name. Highlight the behind-the-scenes team members who go unnoticed. And when things don’t go well? Step up. Own your part. 

Leadership Really is a Sales Job

No sale happens without trust. And trust doesn’t happen without a sale. In this case, you’re not just selling an idea. You’re selling belief. And when your team trusts you, they will do amazing things to support you. The good news: You don’t need a massive culture overhaul to begin building trust. Start small. Here’s how:

• Write a thank-you note to someone who’s gone above and beyond.
• Ask the junior members on your team for a “listen and learn” session to get their feedback.
• Admit a mistake you’ve made and share what it taught you.

Trust is what sets you apart, not just as a manager, but as a leader worth following.

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In the Lead magazine is a collaboration between the Buccino Leadership Institute and the Stillman School of Business’s Department of Management. This edition reaffirms Seton Hall’s commitment to fostering innovative, ethical and impactful leadership. Stay ahead of the curve — explore the Fall 2025 issue of In the Lead.

Categories: Business